Monday, March 1, 2010

Please Sir, We Just Want a Word With You

I don't know what's being said but I imagine it goes something like this:

Cop 1: "Sir, can you please exit the residence. We'd like to speak to you."

Suspect: "Hang on, let me finish my burrito."

Cop 2: "Fuck it Juan, kick that bitch in."

Cop 1: "Copy that."

*lame attempt at breaking down the door ensues*

Cop 2: "Come on Juan, that's the best you can do?"

Cop 1: "Negative."

Suspect: "Eh, you kicked a hole in my fucking door!"

Cop 2: "Sir, please approach the door. We really need to speak to you."

Cop 1: Copy th. . .er, yeah sir. Please."

Suspect: "OK."

*suspect approaches door*

Cop 2: "Grab that fucker Juan! Grab him!"

Cop 1: "Copy tha. . .he's a slippery little prick."

Suspect: "Listen fellas, I'd be more than happy to come outside. You know, just to make things a little easier on everyone."

Cop 2: "Just pull him through, Juan. I have a salsa class at 2:00."

Cop 1: "Copy that."

Suspect: "Ow! I think you broke my shit!"

Cop 1: "Apologies sir."

Landlord: "So who's gonna fix my fuckin' door?"

No comments:

Post a Comment