Just Because: Cam Janssen vs. Pierre-Luc Letourneau-Leblond Goes For Over 2 Minutes

Have you ever been in a fight that went longer than 30 seconds? Hell, have you ever been in a wrestling match with your brother or best friend that went longer than 30 seconds? It's a fucking nightmare for the cardiovascular system with all that tussling and jockeying for position. At the end of it all you're out of breath, sweating profusely and -- depending on your possible state of inebriation -- in need of a good yack. It's enough to make you tired just thinking about it.

Add about ten pounds of hockey equipment, some ice skates, thousands of screaming fans and a running time of over two minutes and you get the following video. Kind of adds a new element to the whole "Shit, I'm tired!" aspect don't you think?

The Friday Ker-Plunk

• The creepiest broad I've seen since Wednesday morning. 151 is a bitch I tell you.
• Dude shoots a stream of fire from his ass. No more Bell for you my man.
• The grim ginger is at it again.
• One of these things doesn't belong.
• Boobies and kittens. Boobies. And. Kittens.
• Link Froggy. Ribbit.
• Dakota Fanning is almost there. Give it a few more years and she'll be primed.
• Jenni Hendrix and Taylor Vixen are in heat and half naked. Go see.
• Shay LaRen flaunting those huge, floppy milk bags. She's also wearing leather boots.
• More naughty girlfriends with great asses. Great I say.
• Go vote for your favorite slutty girlfriend and see if you can't win her some money. Or something.
• Nothing more classy than a fat hillbilly going down on Paul Bunyan.
• Look! They made a movie about your early years.
• The UFC gets banned in Germany. Apparently that whole Nazi thing left a bad taste in their mouths.
• The NHL needs more women in bikinis. Now.

Just Because: Andrew Raycroft Should Be In Jail Right Now

Listen folks, there's a difference between robbing a guy and making him look so silly his soul is ripped from his chest, mashed into a hamburger-type patty and cooked on the grill that is his own embarrassment.

Andrew Raycroft -- the 2004 Calder Trophy winner -- rudely introduced Lee Stempniak to the latter method last Saturday night. Save of the Year contender? Ab-so-fucking-lutely.

You're Supposed to Stay Upright Alexander

Most of the time Washington Capitals star right-winger Alexander Semin is an offensive force. As I write this he boasts 30 goals and 37 assists, and if you asked any goalie in the NHL if they'd want to see him one-on-one in a shootout the vast majority of them would answer in the negative. But then he had to go and pull this shit:



He's never going to live that one down, especially when you consider he's expected to score that goal. Granted, he might not have scored had he not tripped and done a header into the boards, but at least he wouldn't have looked like he was auditioning for the remake of Slap Shot.

The Friday Ker-Plunk

• Seriously people, it's only a fucking video game.
• Susana Spears + the great outdoors + t & a = one hot photo shoot.
• A soccer ball you can fuck. No, really.
• Even victims of spousal abuse need a little motivation sometimes.
• Teresa Palmer looking tit-tastic on the red carpet.
• Ferfucksakes! Can you blonde women do anything right?
• Here, have some slut stew.
• A Viagra commercial they should have used.
• Blonde knockout Scarlett showing off that luscious rack of hers.
• Tons of hot girlfriends are awaiting your vote.
• Shit! I think I see my ex in there!
• Some Elizabeth Hurley no bra see-through action.
• Chuck Liddell has finally lost his shit.
• It's official: Women all over the world do dumb shit.

Just Because: The Sickest Shortie You'll Ever See

Whether you're a fan of hockey or not what you're about to see is going to pull your eyes out and skull fuck the shit out of you. Or depending on your outlook it might just caress your cheek very gently. Check it out:



For those still able to see I'd like to point out that this killer short-handed goal was scored by Cameron Wilson of Murray High School in Utah, and just as an aside I'd also like to point out that this kid is going to be getting more ass than a toilet seat thanks to this little on-ice performance.

Congratulations Wilson; don't forget to wear a glove.